by Kenneth McDade on Tuesday, January 27, 2009 at 12:27pm
When I was little I used to think it was funny to watch my grandfather fall asleep in his chair, but now I understand. In all likely-hood he had sleep apnea. During the 1920’s my grandmother, Anna and he were traveling by train. On route, a strange noise was heard all through the train and the engineer stopped the train to investigate, turns out my grandfather was napping in their cabin and was snoring. Yes, he was that loud. He was an amazing snorer. My siblings and I used to spend the night over at the grandparents and sleep downstairs in the front of the house. My grandfather slept in the upstairs in the back of the house. I remember waking to a frightening noise. I woke my older brother who could sleep though anything…He listened for a while and suddenly started to panic and grab a toy Daniel Boone rifle that he had. “It’s a bear trying to get in the house!” he said. Now mind you normally I would have laughed at my brother and called him some derogatory name, but I was five and the noise was amazingly scary. That and the fact that I had never heard a bear and thought this must be the noise that it made.
Now, we were nowhere near a wooded area. The closest wooded area would have been a park two blocks away, with the zoo right next door. My brother was convinced a bear had escaped from the zoo and was about to eat my grandparents. So, we tiptoed up the stairs as quiet as we could. I was hanging on to his cowboy pajamas so tight I think I might have cut the air flow to his brain. Plus, I was shuffling in a one piece blue pajama outfit with booties, there is no way to sneak up on anyone wearing them; you make the same noise a fat person makes wearing corduroy pants.
When we arrived at the top of the stairs, we were in the upstairs hallway. More like a huge room with high ceilings, it was decorated with a deer head and portraits of long forgotten non smiling ancestors and the hall was incredibly dark. Sometimes a car passed in the street and would create a moving dance of shadows and light that seemed to animate the pictures and that horrid deer head.
We approached my grandparent’s room. I froze. There in front of me was a portrait of my Uncle Thompie that looked nothing like my Uncle Thompie. This picture had eyes that followed you and looked at you like you were talking out of place in church. We stopped. There was the sound, it snorted like the demon bear was going to jump out at any moment. We were frozen, then my brother was going around the corner into the room and I was still latched onto his cowboy pajamas. Suddenly, without warning my brother reached around me and threw me into the middle of the room. Now, I am not sure how many of you have ever worn the pajamas with booties before, but there is no traction in them and this house was entirely hardwood floor. I skidded with such force I thought I was going to fly out a window. My arms were flying about and I thudded against a wall on the opposite side of the room. The noise had stopped. My eyes were searching the dark for the bear. Something moved from the center of the room and started to rise, the noise was completely gone and all I could hear was my own heart beating. The rising shape was looking around the room and turned towards me, then it started for me and I screamed a blood curdling scream. My brother, not necessarily brave had a big heart and rushed the shape with his Daniel Boone rifle clicking the fake trigger like he was firing a gun, he too was shouting. The shape turned to see what had entered the room but my brother was already knocking him over and trying to get to me. The big shape tussled with us and we were kicking and screaming to get away. Lucky for us, Anna, my grandmother turned on the light. It must have scared away the bear. We had been tussling so much I hadn’t even noticed my grandfather had joined the fight to save us. He was on the floor with a big brown quilt with tassels wrapped around him. Smart move I thought; to catch the bear with a blanket like a net.
Anna sent my brother and me downstairs in a hurry. I thought granddaddy must have been hurt from the bear because of the Spanish he was speaking. He learned a lot of that in the First World War . They both came down a while later and he seemed fine. He tucked us into our sleeping bags and said the bear was gone. He appreciated the rescue. As I was drifting off I saw him take the Daniel Boone rifle from my brother and tell him he wouldn’t need that anymore tonight. My grandparents were amazing at making us feel comfortable about stuff like that, but I was worried about the bear coming back. As my grandparents left the room, my brother assured me we were okay from the bear as he tucked his baseball bat in his sleeping bag. I was safe for the evening and drifted off to sleep.
Bear Hunting attire.
Now, we were nowhere near a wooded area. The closest wooded area would have been a park two blocks away, with the zoo right next door. My brother was convinced a bear had escaped from the zoo and was about to eat my grandparents. So, we tiptoed up the stairs as quiet as we could. I was hanging on to his cowboy pajamas so tight I think I might have cut the air flow to his brain. Plus, I was shuffling in a one piece blue pajama outfit with booties, there is no way to sneak up on anyone wearing them; you make the same noise a fat person makes wearing corduroy pants.
When we arrived at the top of the stairs, we were in the upstairs hallway. More like a huge room with high ceilings, it was decorated with a deer head and portraits of long forgotten non smiling ancestors and the hall was incredibly dark. Sometimes a car passed in the street and would create a moving dance of shadows and light that seemed to animate the pictures and that horrid deer head.
We approached my grandparent’s room. I froze. There in front of me was a portrait of my Uncle Thompie that looked nothing like my Uncle Thompie. This picture had eyes that followed you and looked at you like you were talking out of place in church. We stopped. There was the sound, it snorted like the demon bear was going to jump out at any moment. We were frozen, then my brother was going around the corner into the room and I was still latched onto his cowboy pajamas. Suddenly, without warning my brother reached around me and threw me into the middle of the room. Now, I am not sure how many of you have ever worn the pajamas with booties before, but there is no traction in them and this house was entirely hardwood floor. I skidded with such force I thought I was going to fly out a window. My arms were flying about and I thudded against a wall on the opposite side of the room. The noise had stopped. My eyes were searching the dark for the bear. Something moved from the center of the room and started to rise, the noise was completely gone and all I could hear was my own heart beating. The rising shape was looking around the room and turned towards me, then it started for me and I screamed a blood curdling scream. My brother, not necessarily brave had a big heart and rushed the shape with his Daniel Boone rifle clicking the fake trigger like he was firing a gun, he too was shouting. The shape turned to see what had entered the room but my brother was already knocking him over and trying to get to me. The big shape tussled with us and we were kicking and screaming to get away. Lucky for us, Anna, my grandmother turned on the light. It must have scared away the bear. We had been tussling so much I hadn’t even noticed my grandfather had joined the fight to save us. He was on the floor with a big brown quilt with tassels wrapped around him. Smart move I thought; to catch the bear with a blanket like a net.
Anna sent my brother and me downstairs in a hurry. I thought granddaddy must have been hurt from the bear because of the Spanish he was speaking. He learned a lot of that in the First World War . They both came down a while later and he seemed fine. He tucked us into our sleeping bags and said the bear was gone. He appreciated the rescue. As I was drifting off I saw him take the Daniel Boone rifle from my brother and tell him he wouldn’t need that anymore tonight. My grandparents were amazing at making us feel comfortable about stuff like that, but I was worried about the bear coming back. As my grandparents left the room, my brother assured me we were okay from the bear as he tucked his baseball bat in his sleeping bag. I was safe for the evening and drifted off to sleep.
Bear Hunting attire.
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